1. Unbuttoning my suit jacket to the song, "Loosen Up My Buttons, Baby" and doing a car dance for a certain lucky lady.
2. Drinking burnt vodka cranberries in between drinking plastic cups of Bud Light.
3. Riding bike with no hands (something every 10 yr old has mastered), wobbling a whole bunch, then grabbing the handlebars again in a desperate attempt to not biff it. Time spent riding bike with no hands: 0.03 seconds.
4. Bringing up the death of Anna Nicole Smith's son in class. We were supposed to be talking about writing research papers.
5. Two-stepping with and spinning former professor around on dance floor while while trying to appear suave, not drunk. However, was exceedingly drunk.
6. Leaving all my winter clothes two states away and it snowing the tiniest bit in SD today.
7. Singing the Georgia Satellites brilliant, "Keep Your Hands to Yourself" during karaoke to the over-fifty crowd at the Eagles.
8. Paying fifty dollars to see Kenny Rogers in concert. Who am I kidding? I'd do it again, bizzo.
9. Driving a 2000 Ford Focus with a cracked windshield while rockin' it to Reba McEntire's "Fancy." Have I mentioned I'm white?
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2 comments:
I love Fancy. I don't think you comprehend. When I was in fifth grade I didn't really understand the song and I told my mom I wanted to name my daughter Fancy and she said it was a whore's name. When I grew up and realized the words, I knew she was right.
You are soooooooo white, punk! I think I might have to corrupt you with some Dead Kennedys or Bad Brains...get some punk soul to go along with the nick-name! Punk.
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