a few weeks ago, i swung open the garage door and i saw a garter snake tail flicker, and thought, oh great, a snake is in the garage, so i left the big garage door open a bit so it could get out.
i didn't see anything for a bit, so ok. awesome. except not awesome, because as i discovered yesterday, the snakes are living in the mother. fucking. door. a door i use regularly.
SNAKES ARE LIVING IN THE DOOR.
and ok, i know they are harmless snakes but they are in my goddamn door, and they're fucking creepy, and so today, i took an arsenal of various garden tools and pounded on the door until 2 snakes dropped out, and i tried to kill them, and i tried to do this by cutting them in half with a hoe, but their skin is, like, really tough, plus, they really don't want to die, and keep in in mind i am in flip-flops, short shorts, a tee shirt, and no bra, and i am pounding on these snakes and b is watching from the kitchen window horrified, and i finally killed them, and it was a massacre, and i hate, hate, hate snakes and am THIS MUCH scared of them.
and, i know there are more snakes in the door. but i am so creeped out right now. i am traumatized, and i feel bad that i killed them, because i don't want to kill things, but they do not get to have a nest in my door. that is unfair!
i just want to throw up.
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2 comments:
OMG! This is TOO FUNNY! You should've called on your little blockhead pals, they surely would've rescued you (& the snakes). They catch everything and anything and REFUSE to let mom or dad kill anything found in the house.
Apparently, they scared the shift out of you.
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