I just want a jean skirt.
I know what you're thinking: But, why, Lindy? You already own a jean skirt. And we all know it because you insist on wearing it Ev.Er.Y.Where.
I know. I know!
But I want one that's a bit shorter. And I would like fun pockets, and perhaps some creative tattering. And I want it to be lighter. Faded.
This isn't too much to ask. Yet, everywhere I go, I am fooled.
Skorts.
Skorts are everywhere! And they are proud of being a skort! All sorts of colorful tags hanging off these items, "I'm a Skort! I'm a Skort! Check Me Out!"
Are we really wearing skorts now, people? Really?
I'm sorry. I don't know if I can do this. The last time I wore skorts, I was in third grade, and it was picture day and I wanted to look nice, but I still wanted to play kick-the-can in gym class. Priorities.
Skorts.
Am I going to have to break down and buy some? Oh, please, Empire Mall, save me.
Waking up with the chickens.
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7 comments:
stay away from skorts, no matter what! they are not for people to wear. i won't even put them out in my store. we get so many lovely jean skirts here, too bad you can't come to my thrift store.
No, no ... do not buy a skort. You're too good for a skort. And much too cute for one too. Have you tried looking in Sioux City? Surely they have enough stores for you to at least find *one*.
I just went to go look on the Kohls website, and they have a "Skirts, Skorts & Scooters" section. What the hell is a scooter?!?!
Maybe you could make one because you seem to be rather picky. I think we could take an old pair of your jeans (or whatever pair is the right color), situate it in such a way that the pockets are "fun," and then tatter it up. What do you think?
See? See? This is what happens when we start pretending that high-waisted stuff is okay. They lull us to sleep with the "Wow, she does look really tall in that...maybe the eighties weren't so bad..." and then BAM! Skorts.
End of days, people.
No, I don't want no skorts,
a skort is the kind that can't get no wear from me!
RESIST THE SKORT!
Perhaps The Buckle or American Eagle would have interesting jean skirts?
Because all of you are dying to know....
I found a camo skirt at Old Navy for 99 cents. That's right. 99 cents.
Now, I just have to work up the confidence to wear it...
NO SKORTS ALLOWED!
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