Ooh, Ah, Just a Little Bit ...

I'm a little gangsta.

You probably can't tell by looking at me. I am clearly from Eastern-European peasant stock and my North Dakotan accent is pretty thick at times. Also, my fave TV show is "The Golden Girls" and I really like flavored waters. I do not think this makes me appear very street.

Still, I am pretty hardcore. My friend Al Fish told me recently I looked like a "street-tough Belinda Carlisle" and I'm not sure if that's a compliment, but I'll take what I can get. I've had "Circle in the Sand" in my head ever since (and round and round).

Back to me being gangsta. Last night, at karaoke, my badass self emerged and I found myself on the stage flexin' my flow to the sounds of "Nasty Girl" by Nitty. I had originally written down "The Gambler" to sing, but Bridge told me that she was worried people didn't know how gangsta I actually was, and therefore, I should rock the mic. I have to admit--I nailed it. Well, as much a farm kid could nail a song as nuanced and political as "Nasty Girl."

Here are a few choice rhymes from my fave song:

"Must be coffee by the way you shakin' that percolater."

"Last time we sexed, I had her crawlin' like a alligator."

"You talkin' dirty, wanna serve me in the elevator."

"Honey, I gotta lotta money. Would you be my Nasty Girl, and let me do that dirty dance with you."

Note the subtle rhyme scheme, the bold word choice, the "elegantly rendered" (shout out to FAR) description of the dance of love between a woman and a man. Nitty, you speak to my soul.

So, would you? Would you be my Nasty Girl?

Really, have you gotten a better offer?